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Kate Nauta and Jason Statham star in "The Transporter 2."Review
'Transporter 2' is filled with cheap thrills
The film's sort of like James Bond on crank; it has no value but it is fun to watch nonetheless.
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Cars flying through the air, leaping from building to building. Nine-on-one fight scene in which the nine don't stand a chance. Women in lingerie firing big guns. Man, are movies great or what?
"The Transporter 2" is one grand gush of fast cars, karate kicks, crazy stunts and bad guys who always pull the trigger just a little too late. It is sweet, guilty pleasure territory, completely void of pretense, meaning or value and absolutely ruthless in its pursuit of cheap thrills.
All of that is in keeping with the original "Transporter," of course. The difference this time around is there's more of everything. More car crashes, more chases, more shots fired, more heads cracked. Unfortunately, in an apparent attempt to upgrade the film's production, there are also some fairly cheesy special effects thrown in toward the end. Those the movie could do without. Just keep cracking heads.
The "Transporter" movies are sort of like James Bond on crank. Jason Statham stars as Frank Martin, a former special services soldier who now specializes in transporting cargo -- any kind of cargo -- from one place to another. Bank robbers, kidnapped bodies, briefcases with bombs, doesn't matter. You pay him, Frank will put it in the trunk of his car and deliver it where you want.
Frank's cargo in "T2" is a little boy named Jack (Hunter Clary). Frank is driving the kid around for a while because the kid's normal driver is sick. So of course the kid becomes the target of an international conspiracy to poison the world's most powerful drug police. Frank couldn't drive just some normal kid around.
Frank becomes aware things aren't normal when somebody tries to apparently kill young Jack. This attempted assassination happens the old-fashioned way: a skinny woman with short blonde hair wearing way too much mascara and red high heels rips off a nurse's uniform and begins walking around in see-through underwear while shooting two huge guns. That's how the Kennedy assassination went down, they just covered it up.
The movie then becomes mainly a matter of watching this skinny woman (Katie Nauta) shooting people while in various states of undress. Well, sure, Frank beats a lot guys up and drives real crazy and all that. But most male eyes will keep drifting back to the skinny woman character. Her name is Lola.
Lola. Really, this may be the most perfect guy movie ever made.
Anyway, the plot is obviously a rehash of "Traffic," "Man on Fire" and the third season of "24," but who cares? The story is nothing but a paper-thin excuse for stunt scenes and Lola, and the truth is, stunt scenes and Lola are going to be more than enough for most folks.
Statham ("The Italian Job," "Snatch") is hardly a household name. He may not even be a household name in his own household, but he's a perfect sort of post-modern hero, with his constant stubble and balding head and streets of London accent. He looks like the kind of guy who might mug a tourist, but when he starts pulling all his Jackie Chan moves you realize he's a superhero in disguise.
Oh, there's also a French cop (Francois Berleand) from the first movie along for comic relief. This is inevitable because "The Transporter" franchise comes from writer-producer Luc Besson, the French whirlwind behind "Unleashed," "La Femme Nikita," "Ong Bak," "The Professional," "The Fifth Element" and assorted other mayhem celebrations. Apparently he thinks French accents are inherently funny. He's not alone. "The Transporter 2" is good trash, the sort of loud bang-bang flick that's so over-the-top you buy it with a laugh. Treasure it for what it is: In a world of strife and tension, we all have to be ready to embrace our inner Lolas.
You can reach Tom Long at (313) 222-8879 or tlong@detnews.com.
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