Mike O'Hara: Monday Countdown

Pick kid's spelling bee over Lions for excitement

There is a class system in the NFL, and the Lions are the bottom dwellers.

There's no light at the end of the tunnel in the place the Lions inhabit.

With nine games left in their joyless season, they have no safe haven anywhere, even at home.

Ford Field could be re-named Morgue Field -- or Bored Field.

You want drama, excitement, competitive atmosphere, then go to your kid's spelling bee. There isn't much to cheer about at Ford Field.

The fallout from Sunday's 17-10 loss to the Louis Rams is worse and more lasting than the loss itself, and not just because it came against a team that was 0-7 with a 16-game losing streak going into the game.

The most severe punishment for losing is that the Lions have to keep playing in a season without hope.

Think about this: what inspirational message does coach Jim Schwartz give his team? How about: "Hey, guys, we have a charter flight to Seattle this weekend and the airline serves food -- for free!!!"

The Lions are 1-6 and anchored in last in the NFC North -- the division's only team with a losing record.

The immediate impact of Sunday's loss is one issue in this week's Monday Countdown. There is also an assessment of Matthew Stafford, Steven Jackson's impact for St. Louis, the makeup of Detroit's roster, Brett Favre's return to Green Bay, and Schwartz qualifying for full-fledged membership in Detroit's brotherhood of losing coaches.

We start with Schwartz:

1. Losers Club: Schwartz has passed the initiation test. The 1-6 record and four-game losing streak are not aberrations. It has happened to his predecessors this decade.

The list: Marty Mornhinweg started out 0-12 in 2001; Steve Mariucci won his first game as coach in 2003 and lost the next six; As an interim coach for five games in 2005, Dick Jauron lost the first three; In 2006, Rod Marinelli went 0-5.

And now Schwartz is 1-6 in his turn on the firing line.

The record for Schwartz shows nothing new, nothing different, about this regime.

The feeling here is that Schwartz can make it, but there's no guarantee.

But let's move forward to the upcoming schedule, which gets drearier by the week:

2. Game 8 Sunday at Seattle: The Seahawks are 2-5, but the early line favors them by 10 points.

One of Seattle's victories was Game 1 at home -- 28-0 over the Rams.

3. Game 9, Nov. 15 at Minnesota: The Vikings are 7-1 and have a bye the week before playing the Lions. In Game 2 at Morgue Field, they spotted the Lions a 10-0 lead before winning 27-13.

4. More on Game 9 in Minnesota: If the next two weeks run their predictable course, Detroit will leave Minnesota with a six-game losing streak and a 1-8 record.

The Vikings will be 8-1 -- and the Lions will have no chance to win the NFC North because a sweep by the Vikings gives them the tiebreaker advantage.

What a cheery thought -- eliminated from the division race with six weeks left.

5. Game 10, Nov. 22 vs. the Browns at Bored Morgue Field: Maybe the Lions will beat the Browns, but who's going to watch? The air is out of this season. Try selling tickets for a Browns-Lions matchup.

Maybe they can get Jim Brown and Joe Schmidt to arm wrestle.

6. Action Jackson: Bryan Burwell, a columnist for the St. Louis Post-Dispatch and a former colleague at The Detroit News, talked to Jackson after Sunday's game. When the Rams got the ball to start their winning drive, Jackson told Burwell he went around the huddle and looked in his teammates' eyes. He saw no fear.

"Enough," Jackson shouted, telling them he wanted to stop the losing streak.

Jackson walked the talk, with a 25-yard run for the winning score and 149 rushing yards overall.

7. Stafford: It was obvious he hasn't recovered completely from the injured right knee that kept him out of the previous two games, but he was healthy enough to play.

Stafford didn't play his best game or his worst, but his receivers weren't much help. There were at least a half dozen flat-out drops, and they started early.

On the first possession, a ball went through Bryant Johnson's hands for what would have been a 30-yard gain to the Rams 30. It was a preview of what was to come.

8. Trick and treat: The first Rams touchdown was a coaching win for their side. They tricked the Lions on a touchdown pass off a fake field goal in the last minute of the first half.

The Lions rushed hard on what would have been a 54-yard attempt by Josh Brown, who threw the TD pass. Cliff Avril, who nearly caught receiver Daniel Fells inside the 20, was asked if anyone yelled to watch for a fake.

"Noooo," Avril said, stretching out the word.

Amazing.

Just amazing.

Or maybe it wasn't.

9. Roster roulette: Enough has been seen to know what the Lions need to add for next year -- running back, receiver, defensive tackle, cornerback, return specialist.

Calvin Johnson's absence for two games and most of a third has exposed other players. There's no one with the skill to make a play on his own.

10. Favre at Lambeau: Boos greeting Brett Favre at Lambeau Field on Sunday were more widespread than I expected, but the outcome of the Vikings-Packers game wasn't. Favre threw four TD passes in a 38-26 Vikings win.

Packers fans have strong loyalties and short memories, and there's nothing bad about either. But they shouldn't forget what Favre meant to that franchise.

When he arrived in 1992 in a trade with Atlanta, Green Bay had made the playoffs just twice from 1968 through 1991. Once was in the nine-game strike season of 1982.

With Favre, the Packers were consistent contenders. The 1996 Packers won a Super Bowl, and the 1997 team nearly repeated, losing to the Broncos in the Super Bowl.

11. My top 5 teams

* Saints (6-0): Heavy favorites over the Falcons at home in an exciting Monday Night matchup.

* Colts (7-0): They found a way to beat the 49ers -- on a halfback TD pass.

* Vikings (7-1): Running away with the NFC North -- and the best of Adrian Peterson lies ahead.

* Eagles (5-2): A big win at home against the Giants. The Phillies couldn't get it done against the Yankees across the parking lot.

* Broncos (6-1): Next up after Sunday's thrashing at Baltimore: home against Pittsburgh on Monday Night.

12. My bottom 5 teams* Titans (1-6): Vince Young ended the losing streak. No surprise. He's 19-11 as a starting quarterback.

* Rams (1-7): Beating the Lions moves them out of last -- but I still think they're the league's worst team.

* Lions (1-6): This is the price of losing to the Rams -- a franchise for sale. If it was a house, the owner would walk away and let the bank have the Rams.

* Browns (1-7): Does anyone remember when there was speculation that the Lions should consider trading a high draft pick for QB Derek Anderson?

* Buccaneers (0-7): Losing counts for everything.

13. Picking the Lions to beat the Rams: I thought the team desperate to win a game would pull out the stops. And I was right. But it was the Rams who did it, not the Lions.

The Lions approached the game like it was business as usual. And it was -- another loss.

The Rams had a trick play ready and sprung it -- the TD pass on a fake field goal.

That's coaching.

mike@mikeoharasports.com

Contact Mike O'Hara at mike@mikeoharasports.com